I don’t know why this came strongly to mind, but it did. It’s not anything the book is mentioning right now, but I’m sure that has something to do with it somehow. So I’m writing it.
Random winter evening in college, I decided to paint.
Just randomly painting. I think it was actually one of those dready day things.. somehow dready lends itself to artsy stuff well. Something to do, and something enjoyable to be doing while cooped up inside while it was later snowing outside.
So I dig out the set of cheap kids paints from the school supply area of walmart and roll of paper from the same department, nothing fancy at all. and I painted a few random things, just for amusement sake, not expecting any sort of high quality or anything… just painting.
So I made a small stack of really random cute-sy paintings. As this was during my first of several rounds of having a journal style blog on open diary, so I took some pics the next day with my webcam
(for some reason it won’t let me rotate the last one… turn your monitor upside down.)
So my expectations weren’t real high or anything. Just amusement.
But after these few… I started on something that involved a diagonal stripe of red below a diagonal stripe of blue. I don’t even remember what actually. So I made the red stripe. And then the dark blue above it.
And the red bled into my blue. Not the blue into the red as expected if it was going to bleed, but the red into the blue.
And for some reason.. “out of the blue”, instead of taking it in stride and working with it, or just getting a new paper, this really upset me. I mean, majorly upset me. PMS maybe? Dunno. But it did.
I dumped the water cup on it… and grabbed a washrag and tried to wash it off.
And when that didn’t work, I went to my shelves, got my box of toys, filled my supersoaker, and blasted the thing.
Indoors. On the wood floor of my studio apartment.
And I refilled it, and pumped it to a higher pressure, and did it again.
The paper actually survived this, having been draft-dotted to my drafting board from theater tech and lighting. The blue faded, but kinda bled over the whole paper… the red came off a little bit, but had been on a lot longer, and mostly remained.
So in a fit of annoyance, I used my fingers instead of my brushes to make some streaks of other colors under the red to make a blurry rainbow on the drenched paper…
And left it there for dead, not even cleaning up, while I flopped on my bed and bawled for some entirely unknown reason. Just absolutely lost it.
From being in a pretty decent mood to total breakdown in less than 5 minutes over nothing.
Eventually I fell asleep. The spell was over in the morning.
And to this day I haven’t the foggiest idea what that was all about or where it came from.