Survival of the monkeys

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Back me up

At work, we have several policies that don’t make the most sense from a customer service perspective.

I think everywhere does to some extent.

Sometimes, what makes the customer unhappy at the moment is what works out best for customers at large in the long run.

And I get this.

And so, even with the policies I don’t agree with, I follow through with them anyways.

What seriously annoys me though…. is when the same supervisors who have a hand in creating these policies…. who tell us we much enforce these policies…. get hit by a customer, and instead of backing me up, they completely turn and break the policy… making me the jerk for trying to do what they told me I had to do.

Sometimes I have to be the bad guy. But if you’ve got a policy making me be the bad guy, it’s really lame when you get to decide to just toss it to the wind and be the good guy you won’t let me be.

Just a random peon frustration moment.

Monkey brain

Monkeys are everywhere.

Parts are in my backpack. Parts are in my car. Parts are in my bedroom. Parts are at my mom’s house.

And I’m started to get worried about not getting them done… even though I’ve been spending what seems like every random few minutes, between classes and while waiting for things and before bed and any other time, with a monkey part and a needle in my hands.

5 days to go. Roughly half are done. Others are all at various points in the process.

I knew I was crazy going into this. But now the heat is on.

Spending the $100 on a all-included low effort party makes all the more sense now… but what’s done is done… and as little time as I have, money is just about as limited… so here we go.

I’m pretty sure I’m not going to want to see a monkey again. lol

The groove

I’ve discovered I have a groove in my head.

Well, 2 of them.

Not the musical sort. The dent sort.

It’s sort of weird… and even more weird that I’ve never noticed it before… but when I have my glasses off, and rub my fingers along the area in front of my ear for about 2 inches, there is a very clear groove that’s been made.

I’ve never had glasses that fit particularly tight… usually they are actually a bit loose and have issues with sliding forward.

But I guess even gentle pressure, left long enough, is enough to create a major dent in what appears to be solid flesh, firm with bone behind it.

I sort of want to get some sort of weird shaped arms for my glasses to make dented shapes… or maybe put some shape between the arms and my head… but then, that would probably look a bit crazy and take way too long to be practical.

But a good lesson to remember in the power of persistence… even if soft and low pressure… making grooves into my head where I may not want them to be, or even realize they are having an effect.

Making the answer work

I just finished taking college algebra, a class two classes above the one that I had mixed success with the first try at college.

And on a lot of the questions, the answers were in the back of the book.

But, there’s a point in a complicated problem… where the only help having the answer is, is that it tells you that you aren’t on the right path.

This helps a tiny bit, but really, not much. You still have no idea how to get to the right way to work the problem. You basically end up with trial an error, scribbling and erasing any number of methods, until you finally get something that gets you to the right answer that you already know is the right answer.

In a lot of cases, I know what my problem is.

I know the answers to most of my problems. Mostly things like “have faith” and “trust God”.

I just don’t know how to get between the two.

But sometimes more frustrating than the problem itself, is the failed attempts at finding a useful tutor for that problem… be it a person, a book, or a therapist.

A lot of them want to just keep telling you the answer. And telling you the answer again. And telling you the answer phrased differently. As if you don’t already know the answer in most cases, and as if knowing that the answer is 52 fixes the fact that your mess of numbers is coming up with 4,538.27 instead. Even though you already agree that the answer is 52, and never even pretended your answer was right, still… they just keep trying to drive home the point that you need to get 52.

Or the reverse, to just keep telling you what you are doing is wrong. As if you can’t already guess that… I mean, if it were working out right, would you be wasting your time still messing with this? You already know you don’t have 52, you just have no idea how to fix that. Apparently neither do they, or if they do, they aren’t sharing it.

Or the classic reminder that you need to do your own homework, and shouldn’t be having other people do your tests for you. As if you had any idea what you were doing to be able to do it, or hadn’t already given it an extended attempt trying to work it out in a hundred different ways. No matter how much you point out that your weren’t asking for them to do it, you were just asking for a hint on where to start, this one just isn’t listening to the question or just doesn’t want to bother with explaining it.

But my favorite is always the ones who decide that the best way to help you with this huge complicated problem is to start explaining to you how to add 5 plus 2 and get 7. Or, in occasional bad cases, how to add 5 plus 2 and get 4. It doesn’t matter to them that you know how to multiply and divide already and that all you need is help knowing when to do them to which numbers. You asked for math help, and they are going to help you with your college algebra problem by teaching you preschool numbers over again, and act like you are ungrateful if you try to point out that you are past that point in the process.

But somewhere… somewhere… lost like a needle in a haystack, is the person/book/verse/lesson of reason.

The one who actually is not only familiar with this sort of problem, but also has an idea as to how to make it work out.

The one who can make a simple comment, telling you to square everything and the square root thingy will be cancelled out. And suddenly, with just that quick offhand suggestion, the numbers cooperate and as if by magic all of the mess stops. And by continuing on with the same steps you’ve been trying, suddenly you get results that take you where you needed to be as if it were the easiest thing in the world.

I’ve really got to find a way to steamline the process of finding that tutor.

Because I’m really good at finding the ones who just keep telling me to read my Bible and pray, as if I would have never thought to try that.
And the ones that just keep telling me that God is the solution, with no real help in how to get there from here.
And the ones that tell me again how big my mess is.
And the ones who tell me I need to just work it out.

And unfortunately… to someone like me with a mile-wide independent streak… the annoyance of being desperate enough to be resorting to asking for help, and still finding nothing useful, can be about as frustrating as the problem itself, and all the more reason not to even try looking the next time I’m hopelessly stuck.

Wedding season

Today was a big wedding event at work… not a weeding itself, but one of the shows where everyone who sells anything tries to convince brides to use their company.

As in, we were even required to ask people when they bought tickets whether or not they were a bride, and give them a certain marking object if they were so that the people selling things knew who to pay attention to, and who they could basically ignore.

I was actually warned about this show in advance… both about the people, and about its ability to make single people depressed realizing some of the less than positive types that have successfully landed a mate somehow.

And yes, some of the people were jerks… and some of the people made you marvel that someone out there does apparently have a thing for the “people of walmart” types.

But the biggest thing that really hit me today was neither of those things.

Maybe I’ve just become a serious cynic, but the thing that really massively hit me was how much money was wasted in this whole circus.

How many millions of dollars got spent today.. for what is pretty much just a big party.

I mean, really… the official part costs about $50.

But so much of the flair… and the extravagance… and the.. well.. gaudiness?

It’s hard for me to imagine being in the position to be able to spend even in several years the amount that some of these people spend on a single day.

Sooo many things in the world could be done with just the money that americans spend each year showing off for each other on their day of their dreams.

I guess it’s just hard for me to ever even imagine being so swept up by that dream of the perfect day of bliss as to be that completely detached from economic reality.

It almost made me wish someone would set up a booth, hire a justice of the peace to sit there, and offer free marriages on the spot to anyone willing to take them up on the offer of jumping out of this craziness.

But somehow I doubt they would have too many takers.

Tires and mercy

My tire went flat today.

A very bad time for it to do so, but, is there ever a good time?

In this case, it went flat while on a major highway.

And yet, it just went flat… not blowing out in a major fashion as high speed driving tends to cause when a tire suddenly goes flat.

And, in spite of driving on it for nearly half a mile after I realized the problem… because I couldn’t get out of traffic and to the shoulder quicker… there was no rim damage, which I wouldn’t have easily been able to afford to repair.

And, it decided to happen when I was headed to work on a day when things weren’t too critically busy… instead of on the way to a test or something else that would have a more major impact from being late.

And, the best used tire price to be found by calling around was a good amount less than the last time I had to find one. (Yeah, I’m trying to make it through best I can at this point… new tires would be nice, but nowhere near the high priority list… used ones as needed will stall things for now till things look up financially…)

And.. I knew what hours were supposed to be on my check this week, and how much that would give me… which was going to be tight already due to days of not working around the holidays. But somehow, I must have missed a show at the other office or something, because the check was higher than it should have been…. by just about the price of a used tire.

So suddenly needing a tire isn’t a very good thing. But I’m sure glad that at least things went as gentle as they could have.