Things have been getting a bit easier on me emotionally. The tears are much less, and overall I’ve actually been feeling pretty strong emotionally.
Or they were.
But tomorrow is 6 months ago that I met Prince Charming for dinner, technically as friends, and he formally asked to take the relationship to the dating level.
Granted, we’d been in the grey area for a while, with even his teen son as calling it dating before that point…. but that was the night that things became real.
And as the sweet evening went on… with a trip for ice cream that neither of us even made it halfway through a small cone before it had melted… I realized that I had a decision to let my heart get fully involved, or to keep things on a more recreational just beyond friends level…. to decide to trust him or to withhold it until I was more sure.
But the time the evening ended, well after midnight, after having gone downtown to watch the fountains… there was no doubt at all in my decision.
He didn’t have my heart anywhere near as serious as he does now… but the initial claim had been made.
I didn’t think he really realized it on his side until about a week and a half later, when we took a trip to the nearest large city to walk along their plaza area watching the newly lit Christmas lights, dinner and drinks with tables overlooking the light displays, and taking a horse drawn carriage ride.
But a few months back, he told me that he had known the minute he first got to hold my hand.
The trip had been magical.. but that first night… had been such a deep, peaceful, soothing evening. It was the evening my heart changed, and I believe it to have been permanently.
A few weeks ago, I’d asked him to do a trip back to the city this weekend… knowing we had a long weekend and with his schedule for the rest of the summer, it’d be our last chance to do some things there that we’d wanted to do together, including catching a game with the professional baseball team in that city.
This is going to be a very long weekend emotionally…. as the gap in my life where he belongs seems especially huge right now.