I’m finding myself really hurting again.
I thought things were going a lot better… that things have stabilized more.
But, there was an incident yesterday when I ended up in tears missing the prince while I was on the phone with someone.
In addition to the email to him about his profile.
I’m just sort of feeling like I’m losing it to emotions again.
I need to stop caring…. I just don’t know how.
I need to figure out how to untie these attachments before they keep pulling me around every time he does something that tugs at them.
I need to reach the point that I don’t find myself wanting to look after him… to try and help him…
I need to stop missing him… to stop wanting to just hold him.
To stop wishing things were different…. and accept that they aren’t.
It just hurts.