I spend part of this weekend catching a new support person up to speed on exactly what happened with the prince… from the time we met up to current.
This ended up being 16 pages, single spaced in word.
5 of that was up to the breakup… 9 was breakup to now… 2 was more of final reflections.
It won’t be posted here, both because there’s already probably too much of a record here, and because it
It ended up being a sort of interesting experience writing it out.
It was interesting which parts came to mind immediately, and which ones came to me more as I’d worked past them to go back and fill them in.
It was interesting which events ended up being something that was significant later in understanding the lead up to something else making sense… and which ones seemed to just be isolated and standing alone.
It was interesting to observe the flow of emotion from one to another… and places where it seems like one feeds from the other that I didn’t notice.
I don’t like a lot of my actions… even though I do understand them knowing where I was at the time.
Some of his actions I understand more in the grand scheme of things, and some of them I still don’t get.
And I’m still just left sad… wishing for all the world we could go back to April.. when things were simple and made sense… and just erase the entire slate for both of us back to ice cream on a spring evening.
I know such wishing does no good. That there were issues that would have come out either way. That we are both different people than we were then because of this.
But it’s just sad.
Not like a lonely sort of sad missing him like is common for me right now… more of a "such a shame… ", main character still dies at the end of the story in spite of the struggle sort of sad.
I know there are new chapters and new books for both of us… and eventually there will be brighter stories again, in both of our books.
But this book was one of those that make people want to stop reading books by this author.