And so… on monday… I decided to start some online searching.
What I was hoping to find… was info matching what he’d told me… and nothing opposing what I’d been told.
Yeah, as my therapist has since pointed out… it’s not the best way to be starting a relationship and showing trust… but given the circumstances… it felt like I needed the reassurances.
And initially, I found supporting info.
I found his church’s online newsletter.. wishing him a happy birthday, and happy anniversary as well, thus giving me his wife’s name.
He’d told me right where he lived… because he lives right near where I used to live. And I found info to match that.
Interestingly enough, he lives right next to a disc golf course.. and is really into disc golf. One of the last times K and I were together, we were looking at something to get into to have a reason to be outside in the nice spring weather, and had bought two sets of golf discs… and I’d been looking at the local courses online, and had thought that one looked good because it had no water hazards and I knew it to be pretty simple from riding bikes in the area when we lived there… but then K and I never ended up using them even once before he called it over.
And, the big one I was looking for, was that I found no facebook for him. Found one for his wife, with little public info… but not for him.
He’d told me that he’d had one in the past, but that he’d gotten an email that his account was suspended, and gave a list of possible reasons including that he had multiple accounts, was impersonating someone, or was using a fake name… and he said he’d done none of that, and filled out the appeal form, but was denied and told the appeal was final.
With the way facebook is, that seemed entirely possible.
But then, I changed my search up a bit… changing to using the normal full first name of the name I knew him by, with last name and the suburb where he lives.
I was completely unprepared for the results.